If stress and frustration are regular visitors of yours it may be that you are struggling to live life authentically.
Before you take offence, let me explain that this is something most of us battle with in these days and times.
It is a natural outcome of what I call ‘living life from the outside in’ where we allow life to dictate to us how we will act and feel, rather than the other way around.
This is inauthentic living.
[box type=\”shadow\”]“When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful, a miracle, Oh it was beautiful, magical. And all the birds in the trees, they’d be singing so happily, Oh joyfully, oh playfully, watching me. But then they sent me away, to teach me how to be sensible, logical, oh responsible, practical. And they showed me a world where I could be so dependable, oh clinical, oh intellectual, cynical.
There are times when all the world’s asleep.
The questions run too deep for such a simple man.
Won’t you please, please tell me what went wrong? I know it sounds absurd. Please tell me who I am.”
– From The Logical Song by SuperTramp[/box]
![\"authentic\"](\"http://www.life-coaching-insights.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/authentic.jpg\")
Living authentically (continued)
Living life from the inside out
What, then, does it mean to live authentically and why is it important?
A life of authenticity is a life in which you live as the true you. In other words, being who you truly are, completely comfortable in your own skin, rather than trying to be someone who you think your partner, friends, boss, workmates – or society in general – wants you to be.
I like to call it ‘living life from the inside out’!
The effects of technology
We were told in the seventies and eighties that increasingly rapid advances in technology would ultimately translate into more leisure time, more time to ourselves.
Hands up those who feel that people enjoy more quality time to themselves than they did twenty, thirty or forty years ago?
No, the truth is that new technology has simply served to strip us of what little personal time we have for introspection and reflection on the important things like “Who am I?” “What is my purpose here?” and “What do I really want from life?”
In this 24×7 world of instant and ubiquitous connectivity the demands on our time from the external world are unrelenting.
Think about it. It’s almost impossible to have a 30 minute conversation with your partner, or read half a chapter of a book without being distracted by an incoming call, email or SMS, unless you go out of your way to separate yourself from the technology that promotes the intrusions.
And most of us refuse to do that.
We are our own worst enemies!
Finding the personal strength
Learning to live life from the inside out requires a period of deep reflection. It demands of us to find the personal strength to ignore the seemingly endless and pressing demands of the outside world in favour of what our inner beings truly want and need.
By understanding and respecting your own deep inner desires and prioritising these over demands from the external environment, you will start to lead a life of greater fulfilment, greater meaning and greater joy.
Your contribution to this world – and to others in it – will, I suggest, be far more profound if you have a clear understanding of who you are, where you are headed and why.
And a great place to start is by hiring a life coach!
Living with purpose and meaning
Possibly one of the most important – and certainly one of the most fulfilling – outcomes of the life coaching process is the ability to live life authentically, with purpose and meaning.
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Hi Bill,
This is a great post and regrettably true for so many of us. I also like a saying I heard from another coach – “Live Life Deliberately”
Nice saying – thanks Geoff!
Thank you for these insights, Bill. I’ve taken the liberty of sharing them on my Facebook page at Eagle Coaching – Presence, Possibility, Praxis. 🙂 Also, I am freshly reminded of the late Stephen R Covey’s superb chapter on “Inside-Out” living in his classic Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, where he also captures the essence of an authentic life, one deeply rooted in and nourished by the ‘character ethic’, rather than a life so easily distracted by the values of the ‘personality ethic’.
Thanks for this Roger.
If you enjoyed Covey’s book as I did you might like this Blog Post:
http://www.life-coaching-insights.com/invest-in-yourself/
When one is able to answer these 3 questions:” Who am I? What do I want? How am I going to get it?” one becomes truly enlightened. Life coaching enabled me to find the answers to these questions within me, by providing me with an opportunity to give myself a gift – TIME – our most valuable resource. I took the time to stop and think and to evaluate the quality of my life. I had been looking on the outside for the source of lasting happiness. How happy I am that I decided to change direction, and to find it within. Now I want to pass that gift onto others. For the first time in my life, I feel peaceful, contented and fulfilled.
Thank you for this wonderful comment Karen.
Like you I was so caught up in the external quest for happiness through the conventional route of a high paying job that threatened to suck the life out of me.
When a life coach asked me what my values were I was suddenly struck by how little time and effort I had actually put into understanding and nurturing myself!
Wow! That is so true and powerful! Many of us including myself have become programmed to think we need certain things in life and have become blinded to what is truly important. This is great food for thought, thanks Bill
You’re welcome Greg.
I like your use of the word ‘programmed’ as I think that sums up the problem!