A Shocking Realisation

Before I explain, some context is necessary.

“There are three types of people in this world. Firstly, there are people who make things happen. Then there are people who watch things happen. Lastly, there are people who ask, what happened? Which do you want to be?”

– Steve Backley

We’ve been conditioned to believe that we live in a tough, competitive, uncompromising and even cruel world.

The media relentlessly churn out depressing stories. Crime, violence, economic woes, corruption, joblessness, poverty and suffering in the world seems endemic. The regular doses of news that we consume seem like fair justification for the fact that our own lives are far from what we want them to be.

Elusive commodities

For many of us, life can seem like a daily battle for survival with the odds stacked heavily against us. Happiness and success seem like elusive commodities.

It’s little wonder that the great majority of people feel powerless to improve their own lives, never mind the lives of others in the world.

Many resort to desperate attempts to make money in the belief that this will allow them to buy a solution. Others put their faith in lady luck or the charitable donations of others.

21st century solution

Life coaching is a 21st century solution to the very 21st century disease that is personal disempowerment, or the feelings of frustration, anxiety and disillusionment that come from feeling powerless to create the lives we desire.

Here’s where the shock comes in.

Many who sign up for life coaching do so in the belief that they are paying for a service that will provide them with some special form of advantage in life.

They wait for the coach to reveal some magical tool, advice or formula that will bring them the success they desire.

Not what they were expecting

But the tool that the coach uses is not what they were expecting.

The tool is a humble mirror, the advice is their own and the formula is to take responsibility for their own actions and for creating the lives they want.

Life coaching is founded on these principles:

• We live in a a world that is overflowing with beauty, variety and vibrancy;
• Life is inherently abundant;
• There is endless opportunity for every one of us;
• We are all endowed with unique talents and abilities;
• We are each responsible for creating our own realities;
• The challenges we face are really just opportunities for growth;
• We can choose how we wish to perceive of the world and others;
• The only limits to our growth and development are self imposed.

The last point is worth further illustration and I’d like to do this with the help of a story, called ‘The Limit is Me’ written by a gentleman called Robin Good, which I have edited:

With thanks to Robin Good

One day the employees reached the office to be greeted by a big notice on the door on which it was written:

“Yesterday, the very person who has been blocking your growth and development in this company passed away. You are invited to join the funeral in the room that has been prepared in the basement.”

At first, the employees felt sadness as they reflected on the sudden death of one of their colleagues but after a while they started to become curious to know who it was that had been hindering their growth and development.

Every single employee made their way to the basement. Such was the interest, that internal security had their work cut out controlling the throng in the room.

A rather smart coffin was placed on a raised stage within the room and employees were encouraged to file past the coffin one by one. Gasps of surprise and shock were heard from those who stooped to look into the coffin.

Everyone waiting was wondering: “Who is this person who has been blocking my progress? Why did he do that? Well, at least he is no longer with us!”

One by one the curious employees stepped onto the stage to view the contents of the coffin. Each one who looked inside was rendered speechless! It was almost as if someone had touched the deepest part of their soul.

There was no body inside the coffin.

Instead there was a mirror.

Every person who looked inside could see a perfect image of him or herself.

There was a message next to the mirror that read as follows:

“There is only one person who is capable of limiting your growth. That is YOU.

YOU are the only person who can transform your life. YOU are the only person who can ensure your happiness and your success. YOU are the only person who can help yourself.

Your life does not change when your boss changes, when your friends change, when your parents change, when your partner changes, when your company changes. Your life changes when YOU change, when you go beyond your limiting beliefs, when you realise that you are the only one responsible for your life.

The most important relationship you can have, is the one you have with yourself.

Examine yourself. Love yourself. Don\’t fear difficulties, seeming impossibilities and losses, for they are opportunities for growth. Live your life fully empowered as it was intended.

Make your mark on this world. Be the best you can be.”