The Value of Self Reflection

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Completion of a self reflection questionnaire is the final step in the New Insights Life Coach Training and Certification Programme.

These submissions provide valuable insights into the new coaches that we are about to unleash upon the world to help perpetuate our mission of bringing freedom, self confidence and growth to people from all walks of life through the amazing power of life coaching.

Given the importance we ascribe to this step, I make an effort to read and respond to every submission personally.

Somewhat frustratingly, the quality of these submissions varies greatly!

Tick in the box, or …?

After an intensive programme of learning, practical experience and assessment, I guess some see the process of reflecting on a dozen or so questions – a requirement that, for obvious reasons is not marked – as a simple tick in the box exercise.

And yet, those who treat this exercise with the respect it deserves, in the knowledge that it represents the pinnacle of their training, report that it provides tremendous added value to the overall training experience.

Benefit dependent on two key things

The degree of benefit that is derived from such self reflection, depends primarily on two key things; the quality of the questions and the honesty of the responses.

Good self reflection questions should help prompt deep introspection about one’s behaviour, its consequences, what works, what doesn’t work so well, and what changes can be considered now and in the future to render one’s approach more effective.

They should also encourage consideration of how one’s perceptions, understanding, thinking patterns, reactions and behaviours have changed and evolved during the period under consideration.

Good self reflection practice requires courage, honesty and a certain vulnerability.

The pathway to excellence

Some coaches-to-be see the questions as a test that needs to be passed, and therefore try to answer in a way that presents them in the best possible light.

Perhaps subconsciously, they believe that by exposing mistakes, sub optimal behaviours, and/or areas for development, they may somehow be judged as not worthy to receive certification.

In fact, the exact opposite is true. Focused contemplation that identifies those attitudes and behaviours that are ineffective, less effective or even counterproductive, is a powerful learning process in itself.

Understanding your true strengths and openly acknowledging and appreciating those areas where further development is needed – rather than denying they exist – is the pathway to excellence.

Make it a habit

At New Insights, we view the self reflection exercise as being vital in capping off the training programme. That said, for any professional person – and life coaches in particular – reflection should, ideally, be an ongoing thing.

Research referred to in the Harvard Business Review shows that making self reflection a habit is what differentiates extraordinary professionals from the mediocre.

Some of the questionnaire submissions that have impressed me the most have been a real treat to read. They portray amazing stories of growth and development that accompanies the learning process.

Learning – change – reflection – more learning

Learning, by its very nature, involves change.

By taking an honest, unbiased and detailed look back at that change – from poor decisions, naive attitudes, nervous frustration and humorous slip-ups, to proud accomplishments, major ‘ahas’ and big wins – we add another important dimension to the learning.

As the educator, John Dewey, once noted:

“We do not learn from experience … we learn from reflecting on experience.”

What, So What, Now What?

For those who have yet to embrace conscious self reflection, there are many simple tools available that can help to get started.

One reflective model that I like, for its great simplicity, is called What? So What? Now What?

The model was originally developed in the 1970s by Terry Borton, for use in group facilitation. It was further developed into a reflective model by Rolfe et al, in 2001.

What, So What, What Now?

With regards to the situation or period that is the subject of reflection, the question What? invites you to consider what took place and describe in detail what happened. It is thus past-focused.

So What? encourages an analysis of what happened and why, and seeks to promote an understanding of the implications thereof for the present.

Now What? promotes further contemplation about how the learnings can be carried forward into the future and what the most effective next steps might be.

Give it a try

That’s pretty straightforward and not too time consuming. Why not give it a try and see if reflection warrants a place in your life

8 thoughts on “The Value of Self Reflection”

  1. Thank you for sharing the model Bill. This is such a powerful personal development tool.
    Self reflection seems to be one of the hardest things for individuals to do as they begin the coaching process and yet self reflection is essential to growth in the various areas of our lives.
    Personally I have found that by asking “so what” and then “what now”, I have been able to choose to shift and change repeating patterns that had become dysfunctional in my life.
    When we land back in that old familiar place where we dont actually want to be, being open to asking the questions and then really listening, internalising, realising; and then being brave enough (NHLANHLA mentioned the hard turns, brutal honesty and difficult changes) to try new ways of being can shift us to such a degree that we respond to situations in ways we had never imagined possible. Sometimes the shift does happen easily and sometimes not but the outcomes are so worth the effort!

  2. Nhlanhla G. Mafarafara

    Wow. This is such a great read with silent invitation to go back to what really matters. As a leader in public health, a father and coach, I find it liberating, empowering and refreshing to take time to do deep reflections, on my life, my family, my work and spiritual life. Often we do reflect, but in things we think we are ready to tackle, or we (even your clients) chose to completely put it aside because as you do true and honest reflection, you will find what you like and are proud of , and you will find what really requires brutal honesty, hard turns and difficult changes. But in the end, rather climb the mountain and see the view on the other side than regret not having tried at being a better you. And reflections help you to do just that.
    Thank you Bill.

  3. What an intriguing topic. Thank you, Bill. I have felt the benefits of regular periods of reflection since I was 16 years old, as I have applied this habit to my spiritual life. When I discovered life coaching in 2011, I began to use a few appropriate questions on which to reflect, when journaling in the evening. The depth of self-knowledge and understanding that has unfolded as a result of that Daily Action Step, has not only had a powerful effect on my personal life, but also on my growth as a New Insights Life Coach, over the last ten years. Furthermore, those clients who have embraced the daily habit of reflection through journaling, have also experienced exponential growth in their progress towards their goals.

  4. Thank you for sharing the Reflective model – this is very helpful in giving structure to the thought process! I like it.

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