Who Am I, Really?

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Facing the return to work – or regular day-to-day routine – after a well deserved break, is never easy.

Many of us associate breaks with doing more of what we love, while we see the common routine as a necessary evil for our continued survival … until the next heaven sent break comes along!

It’s no wonder, then, that so many of us find ourselves asking “Who am I, really?”

Breaking with routine

In my previous two-part post,  Why Change Seems so Difficult and How to Make it Easy, I wrote about how to bring about lasting change and the catalytic effect that a break from routine can have in helping plan for such change.

Taking time out from a well worn routine can be helpful in answering the critical question “Who am I, really?”

Through the eyes of others

If you think you know who you are, read on!

You may be surprised to find that the way you know yourself is as you are seen through the eyes of others!

Let’s unpack that rather controversial statement a little.

Established patterns

Much of our world ‘works’ thanks to routines, or established patterns of behaviour.

Governments rely on civil servants following well documented processes and procedures. Organisations depend on people showing up to do the same jobs, day in day out. Schools and educational institutes have deeply routinised curricula and established forms of testing that they follow without too much question. Many domestic homes run on carefully orchestrated schedules or routines.

Entrenched routines keep the wheels of bureaucracy, industry and education moving and, in our efforts to be good citizens, we fall in line and readily submit to this ‘organised routine’ way of living.

All about what others think

The problem, for individuals like you and me, is that routines imposed upon us, tend to keep us externally focused. In other words, life becomes all about what others think of us, how we behave, what we do, how we do it, how effectively and efficiently we do it, and so on.

As slaves to routine, we find ourselves ‘outsourcing’ responsibility for our own satisfaction and fulfilment to other people, institutions or situations.

Losing touch with the essence of who we are

In our efforts to please or meet the demands of organisations, other people, or even our families, we quickly lose touch with our inner beings and the essence of who we really are at heart.

One of the most common questions that clients ask as they embark on a journey of personal transformation with a life coach is: “Who am I really?”

The New Insights Life Coaching System

Our proprietary New Insights Life Coaching System tackles this issue head on by providing clients with the tools to explore their established behaviour patterns, beliefs, value systems and attitudes towards personal responsibility.

As clients turn their primary focus inwards they begin to understand the extent to which they have been living by rote (or ‘living unconsciously’ as we like to call it.)

Conscious creation

As their self awareness skyrockets, clients start to appreciate just how joyful and fulfilling it is to consciously create one’s own path, rather than continue to plow the furrow of imposed routines.

The question, “Who am I really” takes on new meaning, as clients shift away from trying to fit in with – and prove their worth to – others. Instead, they begin to relish their own unique differences, inner power and creative potential.

A new perspective on life

As they gather the courage to step away from the societally imposed routines, and follow their own dreams, life takes on an exciting new technicoloured and multi dimensional perspective.

Better, forever

Once you prioritise going within to find out who you really are, life changes, for the better … forever!

20 thoughts on “Who Am I, Really?”

  1. This is an interesting and profound topic Bill. Your insights on the topic are really thought-provoking. It’s the second time this topic has come up for me in the past 24 hours. Talk of synchronicity!
    Broadly and very generally speaking, I think people (me too) assume the identities of their roles and livelihoods, (I’m a breadwinner, I’m a life Coach or even take on other unhelpful labels, e.g. I’m an ex-con etc.
    Spending time in the present in reflection is really helpful to determine what the essence of a person’s identity is. As you say conscious presence is required (meditation or quite time) and a life coach can be helpful to drill down into the essence of one’s true identity to ascertain Who am I? Knowing who you are is essential (your identity) to finding your life purpose as opposed to just drifting along with whatever comes along. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic.

  2. Thanks, Bill. Certainly, one of the important questions we do well to pause and reflect on at regular periods of our lives. The very best to you and the team for the year ahead.

  3. Mmapula Gwayisa

    Good day Bill
    This is a very inspiring topic to begin the year with. Thank you very much to remind me of myself.

  4. As always spot on Bill! Our conditioning goes deep. I personally feel that the last few years have empowered many people to think beyond their self imposed boundaries and I am so grateful for your program that allows me to support those that are walking towards their own personal freedom. Thank you!

  5. frederic Dauboin

    Hi Bill, Thank you for your insight. Many people identify with their past. Who I am can be answered by being present, having certainty and gratitude for every moment.

    1. That’s a good point Frederic, thank you. Whereas I believe there is nothing wrong with identifying with the past, we shouldn’t be defined by it, nor allow it to constrict our enjoyment of present and future!

  6. Wow! Thank you, Bill. What a powerful topic for the start of this new year. This question forms the essence, really, of the source from which we should begin, as we place each foot on the ground, when we wake up. The response to this question could guides us through each day – either with clarity or a sea of uncertainty. Thank you for the New Insights you provide through the writing of each monthly blog.

    1. Thank you Karen!
      Although we all love holiday periods, they often involve managing of family relationships, entertaining friends and visitors, trying to keep others happy … and generally a lot of externally focused effort. If we have insufficient reflection and ‘down time’ for ourselves we can lose the small window of opportunity to connect with who we truly are. Then when then day-to-day routine kicks in we can feel even more disconnected!

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